Posted by: syncopated1 | April 2, 2011

Chapter 3: Son, You gotta get your mind right.

The wisest man I've ever known.

I struggled for several days on this chapter, trying to decide which topic to write about! There are so many ways  to make yourself happy. So I decided at this juncture to tackle the issue from a different angle; how to stop being unhappy.

Now I don’t know if it is the time of the season, the holidays can be very hard for some people, or winter which is always something of a drag, but at any rate a lot of people seem to struggle with being cheerful and happy during this time. And I am reminded of what helped me through when I was at my unhappiest.

First, my family has always been my greatest boon in sustaining me through any hardship I have faced. Especially when I was down in the dumps and unable to find reason to, say, flap my knees. All I had to do was turn to them and they would lift me up and make me smile. So I say to you, turn to your own families. We all have them, either by blood or by bonds just as strong, and family will always step up to the plate and remind you of what your life means to them and how happy you should be and deserve to be. Trust them, they’re right.

Secondly, a number of years ago, when I was allowing myself to be unhappy quite often I did call my family, and they always cheered me up, but fleetingly it seemed. I really was doing a horrible job of choosing to be happy each and every day, I daresay I was doing the opposite. On one particular occasion I was having dinner with my father, and he listened very intently to all my woes for several minutes. When I had finished he looked at me and said, “Son, you gotta get your mind right.”

Those words have stuck with me. He went on to explain to me that happiness is not just casting your life into a series of activities and behaviors and events that allow you to feel enjoyment all the time. It is a mindset, whether you are an optimist or a pessimist. You have to look hard at yourself and the way you are casting your own opinion on your own mind and figure out why you are so unhappy. I know that after that dinner with my father, I had determined I was indeed being rather foolish at letting an ex, being broke, not liking my classes, etc. upset me. Through the process of “getting my mind right,” I learned to look at all of that and say, there’s another girl out there, I’ll find money and be done with school eventually. Once I got my mind right it became easy to worry less about the world and more about doing good things in this world.

With a right mind and constant and strong connection to your family you should be free of the basic worries to wake up each morning and choose to be happy. This mindset is really what it is all about. And as simply as I can put it, if you don’t choose to be happy everyday then happy things can’t happen to you. So get your mind right


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